Words are Important, Use Them with Care – Principle 4 – 10 Principles for Spiritual Parenting
In the past few years I’ve realized that I wasn’t the best at using my words. When it came to certain people in my life I never really watched the words I chose to use while speaking with them or how I would approach them. If I had a problem or concern I would blurt it out mainly in a rude sort-of-way rather than talking about it first. My sister is one person that has (without knowing it) helped me realize that the words I choose to use can set the tone of a conversation. I never used to be patient when I had something to say to someone. If I was angry or upset I wouldn’t give myself time to cool off and think things out before attacking or confronting the person I was upset with. Now that I am aware of this I make sure I give myself a good amount of time to cool off, think about the situation, and think about the words I want to use to talk to the person. I now try to not let my emotions get the best of me.
Because I’m aware of this about me it has helped me with Lila when I am trying to communicate with her. I try to make sure that if I’m telling her that she can not do something I’m not always saying it negatively. Hearing “no” constantly or “don’t do that” can ruin a child’s spirit. Instead of always jumping to the negative words I try to say, for example, “that is mama’s, how about you get your toy.” It’s just a matter of changing my speech habits. When I catch myself using negative words I try to change my approach.
Count how many times you say “no”, “don’t do that”, “you can’t do that”, or when you uses demands “do this”, or “do that.” If you find yourself doing it more than you would like or realize just take a moment to check yourself and try to rephrase it so it’s not so demanding, harsh and negative. Who knows, maybe it will help our children respond back in a more positive way as well.